illusion of safety

Ya know… I’ve always rambled about how random life is and variables in our life are the ones that make it interesting. But when randomness comes on hitting you constantly.. do you then get bored of it? I sorta do. Yes expecting the unexpected (ERR ERR!!) can be fun and rewarding and all, but sometimes the more random things are, the blurrier your sight will be; how could you start planning things out then? I’m not really the type of person who plan things out to their innermost detail. No. I preffer to leave some space for things to grow. But when you can’t even plan the next step you should take, how could you even make the step at all?

That was very vague, so let me lay out an example: I’ve worked my ass off night and day on my design project’s presentation, only for it to be postponed again and again, with more and more expectations with every delay. WTF is that all about? And sometime I see the big picture and neglect the details in the corner, that apparently, is the core of the whole painting. I worry about the nuclear attack my enemy’s been screaming for, but I forget about their sudden, mischievous stab from the back. My thoughts are always divided into things that sometime… I don’t even know if they matter at all! Which makes me realize the importance of sorting out priorities and pleasures.

Or maybe it’s the habit. I’m always changing, but there are certain qualities (or vices, whichever you look at it) that will always stuck with me. I’m easy to be changed, as long as you can provide the reasons and back it up with clear and well thought arguments (cus I ask a lot when it comes to shit that defies logic/things that I’m not too familiar with).

I’m a human too, my emotions do overcome my logic at times.

I am blessed with a beautiful and awesome girlfriend, but sometime I’m afraid that my inability to appropriate time and space could hinder me from bringing out the best thing in me.

Now this ramble has gone stray hahahah… I should stop now. I thought I’d write something today and update this little piece of shit called blog.

Happy whatever it is you’re celebrating!

This entry was posted on Thursday, September 7th, 2006 at 7:03 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.